I’m ashamed of how careless I was with some peoples hearts and emotions in my past. I would just break up with people and really not care one way or another..I did care, because I know it was wrong, to just ghost people. In my attempts to “not hurt” people and just bail I ended up hurting people more by leaving so many unanswered questions. I can say that I hurt a lot of people while I was dating. Some was warranted.. Some I can say I was really wrong for the way I treated people. When I cut people off its without warning. I’ve ended long, emotionally entangled relationships for small things and there’s been times I’ve been too proud to admit it’s me that’s wrong and I’ve lost good friendships over my own stubbornness. I’ve gotten better at this but yeah it’s not something I’m proud of. I can be very cold and mean. That’s the side no ones sees and I work very hard to not be my “shadow self” my shadow self is ugly. I can be judgmental, negative I can just get into this place where I’m not happy so I just get bitchy🤷🏾♀️thankfully I haven’t done this in years but I noticed that when I was doing this.. it was because I didn’t like something that was going on inside of me. When you judge others, or you constantly find yourself being irritated by a person it’s because you see those qualities in yourself. So when I see myself being judgey or extra petty I look inside at what’s going on inside myself. When I figure it out I journal, write it down, pray refocus my energy but I’m human so there moments when I slip.
I can say I haven’t been my “shadow self” in long time, I’ve become accountable adult. I don’t run when I have to handle a situation that’s hard I don’t “ghost it”
Good question today.