We need to talk about Kanye West

I used to be the biggest Kanye West fan.

Back when C.D’s were hot and you had to have “The College dropout” or you didn’t know music.

Kanye is musical genius and no one can deny that. I don’t care who you are.

You can not deny that Kanye West is a talented man.

Kanye West is also a talent Bipolar man.

I know what that’s like. I’m bipolar as well.

When I saw Kanye post multiple erratic messages all over twitter my heart just sank.

I did the same thing once.. all over Facebook..

I went full on Kanye I’m really open about my diagnosis NOW, I didn’t always use to be…

Because I went FULL ON Kanye on Facebook my ex husband had me 5150’d, I was only held for 12 hours he divorced me after I tried to work on myself.

It was all very traumatizing but it lead me to working on myself and taking care of my mental health and getting a divorce.

I took it very hard and I was ashamed of my the fact that I was bipolar for a very long time and I hated that manic episode for a long time.

I was so embarrassed. I cried myself to sleep many nights around the night in June.

To this day people still make fun of it and to this day I still have to tell people

“I was sick that day… I have a mental illness I don’t believe I’m God. I was having a manic episode and my brain fried.. that was many years ago and honestly I don’t remember that day it like when a computer overheats you can’t get those files back”

That’s really what it’s like but it’s also embarrassing to have to tell people that speech over and over again but it’s the truth 🤷🏾‍♀️

And I’m just a regular ass person.. I can’t even fathom having to do this on a scale of a “Kanye”

I hated life after my manic episode.

In fact I think I developed a bit of PTSD from it so seeing it happen to Kanye West is like reliving a nightmare with my ex- favorite rapper playing my part..

the only difference is.. I got help for my mental illness.

I hate that everyone is blaming Kim.. Kanye is a

🗣GROWITY GROWN ASS MAN!

He can pick up a phone and call a therapist and make arrangement for his own mentally health.

I did, I had to. I had a child. (Now two)

I’ve had several manic episodes.. I’m home healing from a mental breakdown I just don’t film them 🤷🏾‍♀️I’m currently home recovering from one.

I’ll be honest it’s no picnic recovering from them. You’re never the same. Your memory isn’t quite right. You constantly blame yourself and brain for “failing”

You hate your brain but at the same time you love your brain for being able to do what it does.

I’m not a professional but I just feel like Kanye hasn’t fully come to terms with fact he’s mentally ill.

It’s got nothing to do fact he lost his mom.

I lost my mom as a child.

We have to stop placing the blame on the women in his life and place it square on the this grownity-grown ass man’s shoulder’s.

Yes, Kanye is mentally ill. However he’s a billionaire more than capable of dialing a few numbers to get help when he’s manic.

He got that campaign together did he not?

He can do anything he want wants to..

Keywords..

🗣IF HE WANTS TO!

That’s the key, you have to want help..

I’ve been talking about Kanye of my Facebook through tweets from Perez Hilton:

I love that Dave Chappelle dropped everything he was doing to come and check on his friend.

After my breakdown, the first thing I did when I was released was deleted everything I posted and I remembered apologizing and trying to explain that I was sick.

I was embarrassed and I hope some people understood… I know some people were going to think I was “crazy” and I know some still do just like with Kanye his real friends showed up and that’s what matters.

That what will get him through this situation.

The reality of this situation is prior to becoming celebrities these people are human beings with talents that happen to share with us.

Human beings have issues.. One of Kanye’s issues played out publicly and it happened to be a manic episode.

It looked like a page of out my life’s diary.

My first manic episode was in June 2013 and it was triggered by the stress of a wedding and a relationship I had no business in.

I was portraying it as perfect and it was anything but and I was living a lie myself.. trying to be perfect for a man that wasn’t perfect for me.

There was just so much happening, on top of all that I was a mom.. in denial about my mental illness.. I was hiding it..

Kanye decided to run for President, drop an album, he says he doesn’t pay attention to blogs etc (but he does😒) he’s married to Kim Kardashian… you don’t think this man is overwhelmed he has 4 kids and he’s not medicated and he doesn’t seem to be very forth coming about his mental illness or he doesn’t seem like he’s accepting it.. he calls it a “super power”

I don’t feel like it’s a “Super Power” half the time when I’m too happy I’m like “oh shit am I manic”

being manic.. isn’t fun.. I don’t know who would want that super power..

Better examples of bipolar black men real and fictional

There are better examples of Bipolar black men out there if you have Hulu there’ or the network Fx there’s a show called Dave with a character named Gata who happens to be bipolar on the tv show..

(Spoilers ahead)

At first Gata does hide the fact that he’s bipolar but later on in the show there’s scenes depicting Gata going to pharmacy to pick up his pills to try to amp up meds to a show to be more of a “hype” hype man

Just that scene alone is groundbreaking a black man being comfortable sharing his experience with medication.

One scene that stuck with me, there were several Gata had a breakdown in a mall and was hospitalized. He was take to the hospital by police..

His mother stayed by his side, his friends called him crazy.. he tried to jump back into life like everything was normal, he to work at the same mall he had the breakdown in

He tried to give his number to give to do some music and it was super evident the guy didn’t want to work with him.

People didn’t know he was bipolar, he couldn’t help his brain was just different.

The scene that really got me was the scene when he told his friends he’s Bipolar(click to watch scene)

I was so moved by the scene I contacted Gata!

And it turns out.. he REALLY IS BIPOLAR

So I immediately became a fan and happy that a black man in Hollywood was sharing his story, rapping on stage about being bipolar and taking your medication and being cool…

We need more of that!

Mental health is so stigmatized in the black community and we need more black men saying “hey this is a part of my life and I’m fine, I’m a rapper, I’m and actor, and I’m perfectly fine.. I’m nothing like the media portrays”

Yeah we have our moments but so does everyone else.

I think the more you learn and understand everyone’s stories the easier it is to coexist.

Gata is really amazing but Gata is all

The fictional character Nathan on Insecure is bipolar!

And in real life Kendrick Sampson is a prominent black mental health advocate

So just because this one black man isn’t properly taking care of HIS mental health there are black men out there killing it in the mental health department.

When I say finding mental clarity is a beautiful thing. It’s a beautiful thing.

I can feel when I’m going to be manic and I can combat it and turn around my day.

I can feel when the depression comes and turn it around and when I can’t… we’ll I can’t.. there’s only so much I can do I understand that.

I’m human, I’m not a super human they only exist in movies.

The more you learn yourself and your diagnosis the easier things are.

Instead of talking about Kanye we need to wish that man and his family well because they’re going through enough.. stop blaming the women..

blame that grown ass man and his mental health for his behavior it’s his responsibility no one else’s.

He has two grown ass shoulders let him carry that weight of his mental health and it his responsibility to seek treatment, it will be him that has to take his diagnosis seriously in the end… he is grown…Amen

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